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Weekly Chasidic Story #886 (s5775-09 / 24
Cheshvan 5775)
The Lubavitcher Rebbe and His Women Emissaries
The Rebbe responded that he prefers that I write myself rather
than have my husband include me in his report.
Connection: This weekend, thousands of emissaries of
the Lubavitcher Rebbe from all over the globe will gather in Brooklyn for their
annual convention. (Males-the convention for the women takes place three months
after.)
The Lubavitcher Rebbe and His Women Emissaries
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I
was born and raised in Williamsburg. When I was a little girl, my father was
involved with the Malachim, an insular chassidic group. The men never looked
at women. I remember one of them eating a Shabbos meal at our house, and he
covered his face with a napkin so that he wouldn't have to look at my mother.
Eventually my father left this group. I was a little girl when this happened,
so I don't know the reason, but he joined Chabad. And that's when I discovered
how differently the Lubavitcher Rebbe related to girls and to women.
I remember one Shabbos-it would have been in 1954. The Rebbe had just completed
a farbrengen, a chassidic gathering, where he would speak on Torah topics
for several hours.
I was ten years old at the time, and I was standing near the door of the Rebbe's
study. As he walked out and saw me standing there, he stopped, turned to me
and asked: "Did you say l'chaim at the farbrengen?"
"I did not," I answered.
"Why not?" he gently asked.
"Because a girl doesn't say l'chaim," I said.
"Why not?" he persisted.
To this I had no answer, so the Rebbe just smiled and continued on.
Four weeks later-it was also a Shabbos-was the next time the Rebbe held a farbrengen.
At that time, the farbrengens would take place in the courtyard beside
770. I was standing at the back, behind the men, when suddenly a man handed
me a cup and said, "The Rebbe gave this for you; he said you should say
l'chaim."
That was the Rebbe's way: he remembered a conversation he had with a little
girl in the hallway a month earlier and, between his addresses on the loftiest
topics, he remembered to give her a l'chaim.
On another occasion, it was at the end of one of the major Jewish holidays.
After havdalah, the ceremony concluding the festival, each man would
pass by the Rebbe, and the Rebbe would pour out a bit of wine from his cup,
with a short blessing to each person. It was called kos shel berachah.
The farbrengen was held in the small synagogue on the first floor at
770, and I was in the back room, where there was a little window high up above
a bookcase. I could perch there and see into the shul.
At the end of the farbrengen, my father went up to receive kos shel
berachah from the Rebbe. And the Rebbe asked my father if I was there. My
father said I was. "Where?" the Rebbe wanted to know. My father pointed
up at the window where I was sitting. And the Rebbe said, "Let her come
down and get kos shel berachah." So I climbed down from the bookcase,
came inside the men's section, and the Rebbe gave me kos shel berachah
from his hand.
* * *
As I grew up, I realized the high regard in which the Rebbe held the women -
he always treated us as individuals, seeing us as full partners with our husbands
as Chabad's emissaries in the world. I can attest to this from the many incidents
that happened in my own life.
When I was engaged, I went with my mother to see Rebbetzin Chana, the Rebbe's
mother, to bring her an invitation to our wedding. While we were there, my mother
mentioned to Rebbetzin Chana that after we got married we would be moving to
Montreal. Rebbetzin Chana replied, "I know; my son told me."
I realized that the Rebbe had been discussing me. In other words, I meant so
much to him that he would even talk about me with his mother! I felt that his
caring was just amazing.
Right after our wedding, my husband and I decided to give one of the gifts we
had received for our wedding to the Rebbe's institutions, as charity. My husband
sent it in to the Rebbe, but the Rebbe sent it back. He wrote to my new husband
that he could not accept it unless it also had his wife's signature, indicating
that she too agreed to give it.
On another occasion, my husband went to New York. The Rebbe gave him a blessing,
but as he was walking away, the Rebbe called him back and said, "Why aren't
you asking for your wife?" So he asked for me, and the Rebbe gave him a
separate blessing for me.
Our first assignment as emissaries of the Rebbe was in Montreal, where my husband
worked as the principal of a Talmud Torah school. I also taught in that school.
From time to time, my husband would send a report to the Rebbe, letting him
know what was happening at the school; he would mention the different teachers,
and he would mention me and my class. At one point the Rebbe responded that
he would prefer that I write myself rather than have my husband include me in
his report. So I started writing on my own, and I received replies from the
Rebbe.
Before I gave birth to my third child, the doctor wanted to induce delivery,
because I was overdue. So my husband called the Rebbe's office to ask for a
blessing, and he gave the details of what was going on. But then, the morning
after I gave birth, my husband had a health issue, and needed to be hospitalized
himself, so he never called New York to let the Rebbe know that I gave birth
and that everything was okay.
A little later that day, we got a call that the Rebbe wanted to know what was
happening, because he hadn't heard from us. So, of course, we responded right
away with the good news that our son Mendy was born. But then the Rebbe heard
of my husband's condition, and he realized that he was in no shape to help out
with the baby, so the he issued instructions that somebody should be found to
be there when I came home.
* * *
The concern the Rebbe had for his women emissaries, his regard for them, was
so high that he remembered the smallest details.
When my oldest daughter got married, we were standing outside the Rebbe's room
with her groom, waiting for the Rebbe to come out. As was the custom, the Rebbe
would give the groom his prayerbook, and the groom would use it to pray the
afternoon service on his wedding day.
The Rebbe came out, handed over his prayerbook, gave the groom a blessing and
started to walk away. Then he turned around, pointed at me and said to the groom,
"Since she is a daughter of a kohen, you should learn an extra tractate
of the Talmud before marrying her daughter."
At this point, in 1984, the Rebbe had tens of thousands of followers-not hundreds,
not thousands, but tens of thousands-yet he remembered this small detail about
one woman, that she was a bas kohen.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Source: Adapted by Yerachmiel Tilles from a mailing of "JEM - Here's My
Story" (//JEmedia.org), based on their extraordinary "My
Encounter with the Rebbe" project, documenting the life of the Lubavitcher
Rebbe, Rabbi M Schneerson of righteous memory. This story is one of thousands
recorded in the 800 videotaped interviews conducted to date with seniors who
knew the Rebbe in the 30's, 40's and 50's.
Biographical
note:Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, the Lubavitcher Rebbe:
[11 Nissan 5662 - 3 Tammuz 5754 (April 1902 - June 1994 C.E.)], became the seventh
Rebbe of the Chabad dynasty after his father-in-law's passing on 10 Shvat 5710
(1950 C.E.). He is widely acknowledged as the greatest Jewish leader of the
second half of the 20th century. Although a dominant scholar in both the revealed
and hidden aspects of Torah and fluent in many languages and scientific subjects,
the Rebbe is best known for his extraordinary love and concern for every Jew
on the planet. His emissaries around the globe dedicated to strengthening Judaism
number in the thousands. Hundreds of volumes of his teachings have been printed,
as well as dozens of English renditions.
Connection: This weekend, thousands of emissaries of the Lubavitcher Rebbe from
all over the globe will gather in Brooklyn for their annual convention. (Males-the
convention for the women takes place three months after.)
~~~~~~~~~~~
Yerachmiel
Tilles is co-founder and associate director of Ascent-of-Safed, and chief editor
of this website (and of KabbalaOnline.org). He has hundreds of published stories
to his credit, and many have been translated into other languages. He tells
them live at Ascent nearly every Saturday night.
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